random thoughts

Tuesday, 20 September 2005 T: 22 41

In a bar, among that multitude, amongst that sleaziness and chaos, two girls stay at a corner, relishing a glass of wine each after a day of work. There, they unwind, chatting, talking about almost all things under the Sun, from guys to sleeping styles. They seem like sisters, forever never running out of things to chat about, to laugh. To them, an hour of girl-talk daily seems never sufficient. There seems so much things to talk about, yet insufficient time to accommodate that.

Across the bar, set another duo, guys. They sat there, occasionally enjoying the comparatively occasionally exchanges of jokes and comments, quiet most of the time though. That empty silence between them seem not so much bothersome, rather giving each time of ample musing and reflection. They never fail to appreciate the quiet company of each other, somehow encouraged, somehow deepen in their friendship by just sitting there together, observing the world around them.

It would be by mere coincidence, or pure luck, that both pairs find their ‘ideal’ partner in one another. And soon, driven by passion, infatuation, or just ‘love’, marriage occurs. There, the beauty and irony of marriage can be seen – the union of two people who can’t make sense of each other’s world. To him, he needs that peace and quiet, and yet to her, he doesn’t seem to be willing to communicate. The girls confide in each other along the years, securing their bonds and friendships. The guys continue to drown their frustrations with drinks, somehow relieved and comforted by each other’s company.

Somehow, the two couples live out the rest of their years in the type of lives they once felt compelled to live, and perhaps till now – family lives. And in this mundane world, each continues to spend his or her life in pursuit of ambitions and dreams. They have children, parents they felt they are called to be. Whether they live out their lives in happiness or not is a ceaseless question to ask.

For me, I would continue to remain at the silent observer, the solitary writer, somehow delighted in the experiences which I have seen, voyeur perhaps it seems, yet appreciating the wonders of the Creation, still caught up in my own world and time. In this transient and earthly world, there lies that distorted and confused truth. Truth seems what it appears to be, only one day can it be fully and clearly defined. Somehow, all is just a dream, part of that reverie that is gradually unfolding. Happiness and sadness are just but illusions, just part of the dream that will come to pass…

the life of the true Christian

Sunday, 18 September 2005 T: 21 52

Distracted by a loud crash, the bible college lecturer rushed up to assess the situation. Upon reaching his home at the top, he learnt of his son’s fall from the window. Gripped by anxiety and fear, he flew down, to see his son lying on the ground. Hugging him with tears, he whispered a prayer in his heart in a moment.

“Freely, lord, you have given me this child, freely you shall take him away”.

Would I be able to give up the material, earthly treasures in my life? How many of us would, and yet it is expected of us Christians. Would I be able to see my examinations, my career, my qualifications, my house, my computer, my clothes, temporal and insignificant objects which is of no true value when compared to the heavenly rewards stored up for the faithful ones?

I can’t help, as I run in pursuit of the 5Cs, in supplication of my results, how hopelessly sinful, ungodly, foolish and selfish I am? For all these, when compared to God’s huge salvation plan for the world, are just mundane and useless things. Why then is there a need to pray for them. I should rather pray instead for my sins that are washed clean, for others, for revivals, for God to continue his work (not that my prayers will affect his decisions). I should be thankful, be content, satisfied, and even if I am to ask for more, it is for wisdom, for love, for tolerance!

One of wishes in whole life is the idea that the life of Christian can be taken away upon the possession of the faith through grace. Such fortune of course will never come. For the life of a Christian, is not just marked by the good works, by his love for God, but also for evangelising, spreading the good news of salvation, glorifying the One who is sovereign and omniscient. It is no wonder Paul wrote in his letter, “To live is Christ, and to die is gain.” Somehow, ironically, death seems beautiful, the beginning of a new life no longer enslaved by power of sin, of Satan, the flesh, but godly in both the mind and body. I can’t imagine myself not sinning, yet I can’t help but look forward to it, to be with the God who is my Creator yet loves his pathetic, rebellious creation. Yet on the other hand, it is my call to be here on Earth, to spread the news to others, be good ambassadors of Christ, living lives worthy of His name, glorifying the Risen One, be light to the world of darkness, to be His holy people, set apart from the pagans and unbelievers. That should be what that is integral to a Christian’s life.

We must know clearly that though God is unlimited by time, He chooses to work in time, and at last chooses to reveal the mystery more than 2000 years ago. And yet now He is patient, patient with humanity so that more can come to fall under His grace, and as his followers, we must be patient too, continue to persevere in Him, just like Noah and Abraham, knowing very one He will carry out his promises, and there will come a day when we will be finally vindicated.

Perhaps now the ultimate question we must ask ourselves daily is whether we are living holy lives we preach about. We could preach, speak of miracles and wonders about holy living, about righteousness, yet do we practise what we preach??? Will be we able to deny the world, ourselves, for the Cross? We can, with the help of God.

replies

I know i'm not in the habit of replying to replies, but just want to let you know now that i do appreciate people reading my blogs and actually replying. i'm a person quite fond of arguing and rebuting after all.

you know, for some reason, the guys who replies are all people i do not know.

to bill : thanks for finding my blog interesting, and liking my writing styles. i figured out that i'm too lazy to submit my article else where anyway, but i suppose you can just copy paste my article to that place. i really don't mind. this blog is not copyrighted.

to martin w. : thanks for find my blog nice.

to april: thanks for reading. haha

to fatcat: thanks for you consistent reading of my nonsense. haha. i guess i'm quite cut out for crapping at times, especially regarding relationships, which most are disillusioned about, perhaps even me...

to everworld: light is everyone, even in the darkness of the night, there exists the stars, the moon and the artificial lights. likewise, hope will never be extinguished in our hearts. so we hope and remain firm, that we'll make it, somehow, for pw.

finally, to the others who are reading but never wanting to reveal themselves perhaps due to shyness or laziness, thanks for taking time to read anyway. i've many a complaints that it's too complicated and diffiicult to comprehend from my classmates. haha. i'm not really good in articulating, yupz, so thanks for bearing with me.

Right.

s.c.

p.s. to all who are curious about the identity of her, my answer will be sometimes i don't even know she existed or not. i may wish to tell myself that it's a specific person, and yet on the other hand, not exactly jealous or envious when that person seems to talk more to another guy.

somehow, she's there, and yet she's not, a fickle of my imagination it may has been. A painted image of my reverie and dreams, seemingly beautiful they are and so i write. maybe someday, i'll truly find her, but what difference does it make.

for in my mind, i'm not prepared to take the initiative, and so single i'll probably remain. Perhaps i'll die a lonely man, but with God how lonely i can get?

somewhere somehow somewhat, in that cool blue lighted sky, lies those dreams that will always push me through.

a clue though i may give away, she's never older than me.

katrina

Monday, 5 September 2005 T: 19 58

Nature has once again unleashed her wrath, this time at a nation who could boast of their economic and military superpower, taunting mercilessly at the country probably way ahead of many others. Yet with all the intelligence, warning systems, the U.S. of A was still thrown into confusion and turmoil. Till now, from the looks of the flooded areas, mayor of New Orleans estimated a death toil not less than 3000, a relatively small percentage compared to the 500 000 citizens housed in the area, with about 80% of them fortunately evacuated before the destruction of the city.

America has probably learned an important lesson today, which is not to underestimate the power of natures, a power that probably the greatest nation cannot control. In the midst of advanced technology and abundant wealth, she is once thought of as an impenetrable fortress. Chaos and disunity arises in the United States of America not because of terrorism, or Osama and his cohort, but nature. To think that America actually thought that their technology can increased more rapidly than the very results of global warming and thus not wishing to participate in the Kyoto Protocol…

Cruelling speaking, at the cost of the lives of hundreds, the disruption of lives of thousands, the devastation of a city, the diaster may have humbled the great nation. Perhaps this is the time when we look up at the heavens, and stand in awe of the weather, of Creation God has put in place…

As we look at the victims desperately scrambling for aid, resorting to looting and violence, even crimes like rape in the midst of the chaos, we can’t compare but compared one of the world’s most developed country to a third world country faced with the same situation. The sinfulness of Man, alas, never fails to show itself in times of pain and suffering…

on relationships again

Maybe we are all too preoccupied with the temporal and mundane things of this world that we fail to see the greater picture at stake. In all our hopeless and pointless comparisons, we all find importance in that material and physical state of the world, even our relationships. I never get it why girls can beat their boyfriends and seem so happy about it. I never get it why the vice versa happens too. Perhaps in my ideal view, love is a totally patient and others-centred characteristic that is patient, kind, gentle and sweet. Is beating others part of this love too? I can’t help but think that perhaps our relationships today simply too revolve around our own selfishness, not anymore that love which is never hurting, this relationship between 2 self-centred individuals is basically doomed to failure. Then again, the way bgr are now today, with the ostensible purpose of fun and experience, is a depressing sight. BGR seems nothing but an illusion of happiness and completeness, a chasing after the wind. Maybe i can forget the notion of liking someone, not that emotions are for me to control and manipulate, even my own...