“This kind of certainty comes but once in a lifetime.”
Several times I was asked what I look for in a girl. I avoid answering. That’s for me to know and for everyone else to not know. But in all honesty, do people really know?
I have this absurd notion – perhaps we all know not know who are looking for until we found it. When two people click, I think the science behind it is too complicated for the human mind. Yet it happens, and the two perhaps share an innate understanding of each other, an unexplainable connection and with it comes a mutual trust that allows them to confide in each other, and in time to come, commit to each other.
I don’t believe in soul mates. There are millions of people in this world. It would be terrible if it is true. It would be like finding a drop of ocean in a vast ocean. But I think that there will always be two person whose personalities complement each other perfectly.
In the Bridges of Madison Country, the protagonist comes to face a dilemma. What if you found that certainty too late? What if one chooses to settle for lesser earlier on and found that person later on?
As I browse through the movie reviews, I notice that there was minimal mention of adultery or unfaithfulness. Maybe it’s because she chose her husband and her family in the end, out of duty and loyalty, and has to face that loneliness and agony for the rest of life? Maybe deep down, many viewers understand that when it comes to affairs of the heart, not everything can be reasoned logically anymore. Is it morally selfish and socially unacceptable to spare oneself emptiness and void for the remaining long years to come?
In the end, it doesn't matter which decision Francesca made. Follow her heart, and she’ll spend herself living in regrets of abandoning a loyal husband and her kids. Stay, she has condemned herself to loneliness and a lingering thought of what her life might otherwise be. Would it be better that she has never met him in the first place?
There is a Chinese saying – 不在乎天长地久,只在乎成经拥有。But really, is a moment of happiness worth a lifetime of suffering? Sometimes, isn’t it better to not have since it’s impossible to lose what you ever have?